Acquisition Addiction - Part II

Does the acquisition of consumer goods satisfy? Can buying more “stuff” solve our problems? Can owning a new car, a flashy new cell phone or an expensive sweater change our self-image, solve our relationship problems or make us happy? (From Acquisition Addiction - Part 1)

Yes, a new car or great new sweater will make you feel better. It will boost your self-image and maybe even build confidence. It’s exciting to score that great bargain and the right clothing can make you feel amazing!

Unfortunately the feeling is only temporary. When the initial sense of euphoria fades our problems rise to the surface like dead fish in an aquarium. They can’t be ignored and they stink! Back to the mall we dash for our next hit of self-worth found in the form of clothes, shoes, cosmetics, housewares, jewelry; you fill in the blank.

 The very act of addictive shopping leads to a set of its own unique problems. The shopper descends into a dark, muddy pit of self-loathing and credit card debt.

Marital problems, family problems, financial problems, work problems, self image problems, health problems, social problems, addiction problems...none of the realities of life are fixed by another trip to the mall.

Every day we’re bombarded by advertising messages telling us we need more “stuff”.  Advertisements tell us we’ll feel better about ourselves if we buy a certain brand of make up or own a specific designer’s clothing. We’ll be more beautiful and popular if we buy a certain hair product. Marketers are trained to manipulate our emotions, our desires and our dreams.  Guess what? Advertising works!

With easy access to on-line and television shopping and malls in every residential neighbourhood we’re walking a thin line between healthy buying patterns and those leading to addiction.

Perhaps it’s time to step back and examine our buying patterns and motivations? Do you see an advertisement and find yourself wanting to buy the product so you’ll be more beautiful, more popular, more desirable or happier? Are your credit card balances higher than your bank balance? Do you own a bunch of stuff you don’t need and don’t even want? Do you hide your purchases from your spouse or your friends? Are you ashamed to talk about your spending habits?

Have you crossed the line from responsible shopping into addiction?  If so I encourage you to speak to your doctor, who can determine the best way of managing your addiction. He may prescribe medication or refer you to a counselor specializing in the area of shopping addiction. He may recommend a combination of both.  Treatment plans are different for every person.

Don’t delay on this. Do it now before you’re faced with the serious consequences of bankruptcy and financial destruction. If you’ve already fallen into the bottomless well of debt, don’t despair, there’s still hope. The first step to ending the slavery of addiction is recognizing the problem and seeking help.  Everyone has to start some time. Make it now!

Acquisition Addiction - Part 1

Before I jump into this post I have a confession to make. I’ve stolen the title from Beulah Alliance Church's sign in Edmonton. The two words screamed for my attention when I drove by the sign a few months ago. Immediately the squirrel in my brain started chattering!

In hope of finding a thought provoking sermon on the topic I clicked around their website but came up empty handed.  I couldn’t resist shamelessly ripping off the title and sharing some of my thoughts on the topic.

Acquisition addiction! How many of us suffer from this affliction? Probably everyone to some extent. We all have our little weakness – things inexplicably leap off the shelf and into our shopping cart. Perhaps it’s a collection of dolls, spoons, Christmas ornaments, or other essentially useless items. We're drawn to owning more and more and more...and more.

My four greatest shopping weaknesses are tea, candles, scarves and yarn (not necessarily in that order). I justify these because I drink the tea, I burn the candles, I wear the scarves and when I have time (sadly none recently) I knit.

But do I really NEED all the tea in my cupboard? Do I NEED shelves full of candles and accessories in the basement? Do I NEED a different scarf for every day of the week? Do I NEED four sweater kits when I haven’t had time to finish a single prayer shawl in the last six months? Of course not, but with acquisition addiction that’s not the point!

Why are we compelled to buy more “stuff”? I may joke about buying more tea or yarn but shopping addiction is a serious affliction leading to a rapid descent into overwhelming debt, depression and bankruptcy.

There’s a medical term for shopping addiction – oniomania. Oniomania is defined as, “a passion or mad desire to buy things.” Like any addiction, it is generally a symptom of some other underlying problem.  Oniomaniacs buy things to hide from pain, to reduce stress, to escape their problems, to boost their self esteem, to comfort themselves, to reward themselves, and to escape loneliness and depression.

We’ve just come through the highest spending time of the year – Christmas. People go in debt to put the best gifts under the tree. Relationships are judged on the value of the gift. Feelings of depression and loneliness run rampant as we compare our failed relationships to the “perfect family moment” playing in the movies and on TV. Consumer goods are purchased to numb the pain and marketers know it!

Does the acquisition of consumer goods satisfy? Can buying more “stuff” solve our problems? Can owning a new car, a flashy new cell phone, or an expensive new sweater change our self image, solve our relationship problems, or make us happy?

Please post your thoughts below (click on "comments"). 

Look for Acquisition Addiction – Part 2 next week.

What's Enough?

Have you ever considered the word “enough”? I mean really thought about it, rolled it around on your tongue and tasted it or stared at it so hard your eyes crossed while you imagined what it looks like?

I vividly remember having a conversation about this word with a friend when I was ten. It took place on the big yellow school bus we rode each day. We’d had a spelling test and “enough” was one of the words. I’d spelt it wrong (probably using the popular “enuff” or “enuf” version) and was expressing righteous indignation over the fact this word dared to exist! It’s a silly sounding word...enuf...kind of like the sound of a sneeze, but phonetically how do you get “uff” out of “ough”?  What’s up with that!?!

This young fixation with the word was just the start of what I’ve come to realize is an ongoing issue in my life. What’s enough? How much is enough? Do I ever have enough?

The problem came to light when I cooked my first Thanksgiving dinner. I man-handled the frozen turkeys in the grocery store, heaving one after the other out of the deep freeze until my hands could have functioned as ice packs. I wanted to make sure the turkey was big enough to feed eight. None of them seemed up to the task but I finally settled on a 15 lb (6.8 kg) bird. Needless to say I had a “little” bit of turkey left over! Actually we ate turkey pie, turkey stew, turkey soup, turkey sandwiches, turkey tacos and turkey casserole for the rest of the week! Six months later we still had leftovers in the freezer!

When cooking for larger groups of people I’ve done the same thing with roast beef, steaks and even stir fry and desserts! (OK the desserts I generally make more than one because they’re just fun to do...but there’s always the chance ONE might not be enough!)

I thought this fixation with “enough” only encompassed the area of food in my life, but apparently I was wrong! Recently I created a new flower bed in our front yard and ordered a special blend of garden soil from the local “dirt company”. After the truck dumped the heap on our lawn I turned to my husband, saying dubiously, “That doesn’t look like very much dirt. Maybe I should have ordered more. I don’t think there’s enough there.” Then I started to shovel...and shovel...and shovel...and guess what...there was LOTS of dirt. Enough to fill the flower bed AND create another bed all around the front of the house!

You’d think I’d learn my lesson, but then there were the flower bulbs. In my mind I saw endless, rippling waves of yellows, pinks and purples bursting forth in bloom as the first rays of spring sunshine warmed the damp exposed earth. I bought daffodils, tulips, crocuses, anemones, and hyacinths and started to plant. I thought I’d dig a few holes, stuff in the bulbs and...boom; done in an hour. Three hours and 206 bulbs later...I thought I was single handedly planting Butchart Gardens!

These are just a few examples of areas in my life where I’ve been afraid of not having enough. I don’t know where this stems from – I grew up in rural Manitoba. Life wasn’t easy for my parents but we certainly always had enough food on the table, clothes to wear and toys to play with. I think somewhere deep inside we all experience the fear of not having enough.

In 2 Corinthians 12, Paul talks about contending with “a thorn in the flesh”. Three times he asks God to remove it and three times Paul is told, “...My grace is all you need...” Essentially God is saying “I’m Enough!” You don’t need the designer clothes, you don’t need the BMW, you don’t need the latest version of Windows on your computer, the new iPhone, or the 62” TV set. I didn’t NEED the 15 lb turkey and I certainly didn’t need the 206 flower bulbs!

What I do need is God in my life. I need to accept the grace He offers to me every day. Hopefully through acceptance of this grace I’ll learn to overcome the “need” for things that aren’t that important. If I let Him, God will be enough for me. Are you willing to let Him be enough for you?

Do you have any funny stories about things that weren’t “enough” in your life? Share them by clicking comments below.