Not Afraid of Death...Just Dying

Lately I find myself reflecting on death and dying.  Isn’t that a morbid way to start a blog post?

The last couple of months I’ve been in contact with a number of people who are dealing with the end stages of a terminal illness. 

I’ve come to the realization that I’m not afraid of death…just dying.

Let me clarify.  The dying process I’ve seen in people over the last few months is a painful process of bone degeneration resulting in fractures and infection. 

Another woman suffers from metastasizing lung cancer, now devouring multiple vital organs throughout her body. 

One blessing in the midst of these situations is the care and dedication of the Palliative Care hospital staff who work diligently to bring dignity, pain relief, and comfort to individuals in their final days.

Aside from the selflessness of the hospital staff none of this paints a pretty picture. 

Truth be told, I harbor a secret dread of cancer.  My mother succumbed to lymphoma at the age of 48.  We’re shaped by our past experiences and it’s hard to get that one out of my frame of reference.

Did you know 68% of the population indicates a fear of death?  To explain why I’m not part of those statistics let me share a story…

My grandmother was 92-years-old when she died.  She was unresponsive in the hospital when I went to visit her.  While I stood holding her hand, her breathing gradually became more and more shallow.  Panic slammed through me as I realized she was slipping away in front of me.

My brain screamed in protest, “I can’t handle this!”

Before I could think or feel or react in any other way a presence filled the room.  I’ve tried other times  to verbalize what I experienced,  but I’m afraid words come up short.

Panic melted away as an overwhelming sense of peace descended.  I was filled with a joy that I’ve never felt before or since.  The best I can do is to call it close to euphoria.  Peacefulness filled the room and I knew this was good and right.

I don’t know what happened in the hospital room that day.  I don’t know who was there with me as my grandmother danced with the angels…God, Jesus, the Holy Spirit… all of the above.  But I think, for an instant, I may have caught a glimpse of the glory of God.

“…I heard a loud shout from the throne, saying, ‘Look, God’s home is now among his people!  He will live with them, and they will be his people.  God himself will be with them.  He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there will be no more death or sorrow or crying or pain.  All these things are gone forever…’”  Revelation 21:3-4 (NLT)

The process of dying still scares me, but death?   Death is new life.

THINGS TO THINK ABOUT:

Are you afraid of death or dying?  Share your thoughts by clicking on “comments” below.

Luke 1:32-33 - Preparation

MEMORY VERSE:

“He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High.  And the Lord God will give to Him the throne of His father David, and He will reign over the house of Jacob forever, and of His kingdom there will be no end.”  Luke 1:32-33

 

 

It’s the second Sunday in the Advent season.  This morning we lit the candle of preparation.

What are you preparing for...Christmas?  And what is Christmas…A joyful time of celebrating a new birth?  But what if you don’t feel much like celebrating?

Perhaps your time of preparation this Christmas season isn’t for something as joyful as a new birth.

Maybe you’re preparing for a lay off from your job.  Perhaps you’re preparing to face the loss of someone very close to you who’s ill…a spouse, a sibling, or a child. 

 

Maybe you’re preparing to do battle against cancer, or depression, or anxiety.  Or perhaps you’re preparing to face the loss of your marriage, and with it, your hopes and dreams for the future.

This week I find myself reflecting back 29 years when my mother was preparing us (her family) to continue our lives without her.  She knew she was losing the daily battle for survival against what was then a deadly disease…lymphoma.

Being young, I was shielded from the details, but I imagine these weren’t preparations she wanted to make that Advent season.  She had a husband who loved her and three children, ages 15, 19, and 22, who she desperately wanted to see grow up into adulthood.

She knew that wasn’t going to happen, so she prepared by writing each of us a letter that would be given to us after she died.  She and Dad planned Christmas that year.  We would have Christmas whether she was there to share in it or not.

On December 10, 1983, she lost her battle, but the plans and preparations she made for our future continued.

Advent is a time of preparation.  The preparation you’re engaged in may not be pleasant.  But Advent is also a time of hope.  A time of finding light in the darkness.

I pray that all of you reading this today will find a ray of hope in your time of preparation this year.

God bless!

“The angel said to her, ‘Do not be afraid, Mary; for you have found favor with God.  And behold, you will conceive in your womb and bear a son, and you shall name Him Jesus.’  “He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High.  And the Lord God will give to Him the throne of His father David, and He will reign over the house of Jacob forever, and of His kingdom there will be no end.” 

Luke 1:30-33  (ESV)

Isaiah 40:29-31 - Renewed Strength

MEMORY VERSE

“He gives power to the weak and strength to the powerless.  Even youths will become weak and tired, and young men will fall in exhaustion.  But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength.  They will soar high on wings like eagles.  They will run and not grow weary.  They will walk and not faint.”  Isaiah 40:29-31

The last part of this scripture is commonly read at funerals and memorial services.  It’s the “soaring” and “running” part that speaks to people’s hearts.  A few years ago we chose it as part of the scripture reading at my own father’s funeral. 

I remember Dad going out to run when I was a teenager.  He had a degenerative lung disease and was determined to do what he could to slow down its progression.  In later years, when he required 24 hour supplemental oxygen, running wasn’t an option.  Simply walking across the room was enough to tire him out.

Most people, when they reach the end of their lives, are too tired to soar and run.  They’ve fought long hard battles with cancer, heart failure, ALS, Parkinson's, Alzheimer's, chronic lung conditions, mental illness, depression, and any number of other diseases.

It’s comforting to know when our loved ones leave this life they are freed from the burden of illness that held them here on earth.  In Jesus’ arms they are free to soar once again.  They run with energy and joy far greater than we’ll ever experience in this lifetime.

Not only is it comforting to know this about our deceased loved ones, we can apply this verse to our own lives right now.  I sometimes grow weary from life’s burdens.  I’ve run the race of life too hard in the past and have fallen in exhaustion.

When I watch the news and see the atrocities that exist close to home I feel weak and powerless.  What can I do to make any difference in the world around me?

These verses reassure us God makes a difference in our lives right now.   Do you feel hopeless, ineffective, worthless, helpless, useless, incapable, tired, or inadequate?  Take comfort, "He gives POWER to the weak and STRENGTH to the powerless."

Need a reminder about who God is?  Read the rest of Isaiah 40, particularly from verse 12 onwards.  These verses speak of the unimaginable power and magnificence of God.  Isn’t that the kind of magnificence you want working in your life?

If you don’t know who God is, it’s time to get to know Him.  It’s time to understand who He is and how much He loves you.  It’s time to trust Him to look after you in the good times and in the bad.

To learn about God and His love for you read through the book of John in the New Testament.  Take some time out of your busy day and talk to God in prayer.  Pretend He’s sitting in the chair next to you and tell Him your hopes, your dreams, your problems, and your frustrations. 

God will meet you where you are today.  You can trust Him.  Lean on this promise...

“He gives power to the weak and strength to the powerless.  Even youths will become weak and tired, and young men will fall in exhaustion.  But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength.  They will soar high on wings like eagles.  They will run and not grow weary.  They will walk and not faint.”  Isaiah 40:29-31

Guest Post at Faithful Devotions

Recently I submitted a guest post titled "Risky Faith" to the Faithful Devotions website. Faithful Devotions, part of the Faithful Bloggers on-line community, is a place for Christian women to come together and share their thoughts, musings and experiences about God. You'll find over 600 blogs listed according to category in the Faithful Bloggers directory. Please feel free to scroll through their directory at your leisure. I'm sure you'll find something that speaks to you personally. Click here to read my guest post, "Risky Faith".

When You're Just Too Miserable To Pray

How does one worship from the depths of despair or from a hospital bed?  When we’re at our lowest, how do we find the drive or energy to come to God in prayer? I’ve been fighting a valiant, although losing battle with the latest flu/cold virus and succumbed to it’s nasty clutches over a week ago. As I lay immobile on the couch, sweating from the fever and popping throat lozenges and cough drops  as though they were Lindt chocolate truffles rather than some horrible tasting medicated sugar concoction, I wondered how people find the energy or motivation to come to God in prayer when life has thrown them into a pit of misery or despair. I certainly felt as though I was in my own personal pit, although I understand that a week long battle with a flu virus is very minor compared to a life long battle with cancer, multiple sclerosis, paraplegia, Alzheimer’s, depression, schizophrenia, alcoholism, anorexia, abuse or any other number of illnesses or struggles that threaten to cast people into their own pits of despair.

Prior to getting sick I was doing so well, having my quiet Bible reading and prayer time with God.   That ended abruptly when all I was interested in doing was lying on the couch and pressing play on the remote control for the DVD player hoping it would whisk me into a world of oblivion while watching repeats of the  1990’s hit sitcom “Home Improvements”. What happened to my drive and desire to spend time with God? Somewhere deep inside I felt the tiniest flicker of that drive but the energy to take action and pray just wasn’t there. The best I seemed to manage was a silent prayer in my mind thanking God for each day and praying that the next one would be better.

I’ve wrestled with this question since, “how do we pray when we’re just too sick or too depressed?” and I’m not sure that I’ve really got a satisfactory answer. I think the ability to worship God and continue prayerfully when we’re living in pits of despair comes from developing a strong, close relationship with God outside of the pit. If we work at developing this close relationship in the good times, it becomes easier for us to look to God and trust in His goodness when times become more difficult.  Remember, we have the Holy Spirit on our side. “In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans.” (Roman 8:26 NIV) When all you’ve got to offer God is “wordless groans” (and there were a lot of those on the couch last week) remember that He is with you always. The Holy Spirit is there, offering prayers up to God when you can’t find the energy or words to do it yourself.

Another important aspect of Christianity is living in community. Don’t be afraid to reach out to friends or family to share your problems. Find a person you feel comfortable with, someone you trust,  and share your struggles with them. Ask them to intercede in prayer for you. When we can’t pray ourselves, the community of faith steps in to pray for us. Sharing our struggles and problems with other people isn’t a sign of weakness, it’s a sign of a supportive community who cares for one another as Christ cares for us. Make sure that you are open to listening to someone today. Take the time to be a compassionate listener, to pray with someone close to you and to make a difference in someone’s life.